First Terminal Examination Balderdash (PART II)

Continued from First Terminal Examination Balderdash (PART I).


Day – June 11th 2012

Our school reopened!! Woohoo!! Ultimate satisfaction to at last escape from home and reunite with my friends. Less than 1 month to go for the examination and I am 80% on my schedule. It will not take much time to complete this goddamn portion – I thought. So for the complete week or so I was simply interested in coming to school show my face to the teachers go back home then go to tuitions and fleet time carelessly round the clock. I had not yet touched Hindi the reason being I always do it the week before the examination. So everything was pretty much on track – not much to worry about. My mind said, “This time you would simply nail the examination.” Excellent!


Day – 6th July 2012

I had just got the examination timetable and mouth shitted at the sight of it. Why? Hindi was the first paper and I had not yet completed the portion. It was not that I was a Premchand in Hindi or something like that. It’s just that I loathed the subject most than any other subject. No matter how hard I try I will always make those silly spelling mistakes, write childish essays and be happy with the 55 something marks which I somehow managed to get out of 80. You may be wondering – Hey this boy calls himself a topper and yet completes his portion the day before the examination? What kind of a topper is this? Pretty much insane.  Well here I would have to agree with you. But if you just conduct a survey among 15 to 16 years in Jamshedpur you would find the same results.  So being a Jamshedpurian I have the true spirit of Jamshedpurian. So just before the Dooms Day I get down with my books perhaps for the first time in my home and dusted the cover of the Hindi copy.  10 minutes into it and I said, “Hey when did we ever learn this? We have never done it in class!”  A quick call to my golden friends who were no better off than me revealed that we done that particular chapter ages ago. Yeah! Perhaps they are right – I remember standing outside the Hindi class one day for dozing off under the teacher’s nose. Such an amazing experience it was! But let’s get down to the basics i. e studying. 4 hours I studied that subject perhaps the longest time I have spent on Hindi since coming to X at a stretch.  I realized that this is going to freak me out. So I turn towards those beautiful and wonderful creations of man called GUIDES.  They are the lifeline for us. Without such guides I doubt that even half of my class would have managed to pass in that subject. So Soham Banerjee studied Hindi from 6:00 pm to 11:45 pm in the night and again from 4:15 am to 6:15 am the next morning.

Now only God, Guidebooks and Luck can save me.


Day – 7th July 2012 to 18th July 2012

So the examinations have begun. 11 days of mental tormentation. 11 days of living without good food. 11 days without Jeffrey Archer. 11 days without the Internet. This is unnerving! It is freaky! It is insanity! Someone needs to change the system. But who’s going to listen?

Here I am giving out in brief on my battle with the exams.

Hindi – As I have stated above I am no Premchand in Hindi and so you can pretty well guess how I managed to managed to answer that paper. It was a 3 hour battle where I had to keep my bladder under control and write beautiful Hindi. Verdict – That paper was the first worst of many worsts.

English Literature – Now this is some subject to look out for. I was armed to the teeth in English. As You Like It or Golden Lyre or Treasure Trove bring it on! Two hours into the paper and I came out with a frown on my face. Verdict – The questions of The Gift of Magi bowled over me. It was too much for me. The second worst paper.

Mathematics – Yahoo! At least one subject is there where you theoretically do not have to learn to get a sure shot success. If you have practiced well then you will get rewarded in the terms of marks you get. 150 minutes and that was all to make me cry. 2 to 3 wrong questions, 1 question deliberately left out and 3 questions with wrong answers satisfied me that I would not get even a 90 in it. Verdict – The third worst paper.

Biology – Not much to say about but this paper had a funny side up. The question was ‘Define SAN’. One look at it and the first thing which I could think about was GTA: San Andreas with the macho Carl Johnson. Coming out of the room and a few questions later I found that SAN actually stood for Syno Auricular Node of our Heart. Good for a student who slept and slept.  Verdict – Mediocre which according to me translates to somewhere in the 60’s out the 80 marks paper.

Computer Applications – Now this is a subject where I rule. The subject of the likes of Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates. As I am very big man of these big men this was fabulous (at least to me).  Verdict – A great paper. I don’t know what the teacher would say about it. But to me it was the best paper till date.

History & Civics – History the first thing which will occur to you is that you have to study and memorize all the deeds which people who are now ghosts did to this Earth. It may seem tiring to you but for me it is great subject leaving the subpart Civics of course. Verdict – So in a nutshell this subject too was mediocre.

English Language – Not much to say about this subject which is one of my favourite was a big DISASTER!!

Chemistry – I don’t know why that no matter how much I strive I simply cannot get the marks I want to get in Chemistry. Just 90 minutes later I was virtually crying, my heart was defeated at the sight of so much of hard work wasted which deployed the curiosity skills of the invigilating teacher to ask me how the paper was. Verdict – DISASTER. NOT ONE TO TALK ABOUT.

Physics – Now here is another subject where I was confident of my success.  Mathematics, reasoning et all is incorporated in this subject.  But still there is a thing called FATE which rules our lives. So in short this paper too was a Disaster though not of the Chemistry type. Verdict – BAD. BAD. BAD.

Geography – The last paper hurrah! Maps Maps and Maps. Well not much to brag on but this paper I think too is doomed. I am lost. I am defeated. I am a loser. Verdict – Bad than mediocre.


4 thoughts on “First Terminal Examination Balderdash (PART II)

  1. Following the norm of my previous comment, I would say that the last line of this post pretty much sums up my review of this post.
    You are a true loser my friend.
    THIS time, however..Offence is intended. 🙂

  2. Sannidhya u were, are and will remain a complete jerk. I would have dropped the F-Bomb but after I heard that you have wonderfully failed in Chemistry I thought of giving you some consolation… stupid.

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